Aeron John
Photographer . Writer . Tutor
Thoughts
The thing that people need to understand is that the extremely caring, nice and loving people have another side that has been formed by the extreme hell that they have seen and been through and somehow survived. They hold inside 2 beasts
They choose to feed and grow only the one.
Never mistake their kindness as a weakness.
The other beast is not dead, it’s just sleeping.
Solitude gives
Loneliness takes
Solitude leads to creation
Loneliness leads to destruction
Solitude can provide peace of mind, clarity and renewal
Loneliness takes away the love of life, security, hope and can kill
Learn to know the difference when someone talks to you
They may tell you they are great, don’t need anyone, “I’m fine”. They may be lying and not knowing telling themselves for so long that “It’s the norm to be alone”
Those who act the happiest are often the loneliest.
I have my shoulders back, chest out head held high
Looking at the stars in the cloudless night sky
I whisper , “What have you planned for me?”, fighting the urge to let it out as a cry
“It had better be good, for hard times I can do no more
If hard times is what are planned for me, show me the exit sign and I will happily walk through that door”
This heart of mine is battered and bruised, it feels so sore.
I lower my head, let out a deep breath and a barely audible groan
“I don’t know why I ask as I lost my faith in all 3 summers gone” I moan, “on a beach full of pebbles and stone”
A place that I called my sanctuary, a place to think and clear my mind, for many years a home from home.
She said to me, “I am sorry but for you I am not the one”, the light of my hopes and dreams darkened over like an eclipse of the sun.
Heart crushed but feelings for her I did not want undone, I didn’t know whether to lie and say “No worries, you know me, forever the joker there’s no harm done.”
Or balk at the hopelessness of my life on those words and duck and run.
Those who have it all always say, “She will come along when you least expect it, what will be will be”
I tell myself it will be better in the next life, but I’m in no rush to get there even though it will my end one day, got things to do here, places I want to and see.
My mind is spinning and my belly in a twirl, what are these feelings I get when I think of you girl
We talk and you make me smile and grin, please open your heart my darling and let me in
I pray to the gods oh please let it be, my growing love for you and a strong and forever love you will have for me
For eons it feels I have waited for you, I’m ready to step up to the day and you to say I do.
So take my hand and let the great times be, we’ll celebrate our love at every opportunity.
The Gods above will smile when they see, they got it right putting us together and they’ll call it destiny.
Stall Face.
I'm fine, I'm great, you know what I'm like, never worry about me I laughed and lied.
Just tell them another joke,act the fool, make them laugh. Just hope they don't look too hard to see the tears I have cried.
What most take for granted and some I will never know, they have only been hopes and happy dreams that for me have always died.
Time before time and to eternity, loneliness and being the singled out lifetime loner has always survived.
Daily memories of a dirty forgotten war flash across my minds eye.
Like shooting stars in the night sky.
It was quiet "over there" say those who swallow the media lie.
It's the peace they talk about I pray for when I die.
But until then I'll keep on running until I find, what others have and ignore.
I need an abundance of it at my hearts door.
Where silence is valued and golden on that sunny day, I hope to find it before my time here is all but gone and I'm old an grey.
May 2020
Caller :
Oi noisy! Why have you been so quiet?
My Reply :
I've been sharing time and space with a sweet lady called Lizzy Day, a sweet young blonde full of drive and ambition who would hold my hand all night and through the day.
I told her that I would never be that guy people talk of, apparently he is called "The One".
As past deeds by others who I have loved have left scars I wish could be undone.
She said, "But it can be done H, you can love , you are allowed and we can go far"
I said sorry sweetheart but I've just found the keys to the Universe in the boot of an old parked car.
March 2020
“The laughter and the lies you spread today will be your tears and the truth of you tomorrow”
"Laughter is the weapon of my defence and attack"
March 2018
They
Who are THEY?
THEY are there in the past ,the present and forever more,
THEY control our fate for that I am sure.
THEY are many and THEY are one, there to speak to and for everyone.
THEY can make you, THEY can break you, THEY have the power to make a strong man put his head in his hands and cry, once in love with life plead to the gods to hurry up and let him die.
THEY act for all but no-one at all, lift some up and let many fall.
March 2015
My Path
My path in this life is not for me,it's to help people and share my strength when the need be.
To bolster them help to make them smile and laugh. Help them find the courage to take the world on again if only by half.
Time on this plane I have done many times before,it's just this time I know the score.
My time will come when for me my work is no more. A Mister Grim from the village will knock on my door.
I want no tears or grief for me,for I will be at one,finally at peace and in harmony.
September 2017
True Love
You wanted someone to love you
But also wanted someone to blame.
I gave you everything, all I had
But you treated me as a player in your game
I bury my feelings of us me and you
Then without warning, on one of your whims, you call me out of the blue.
Feelings of un-certainty, anxiety, memories of us good and bad
Starting to regret the loving feelings for you I once had.
To love and lose is better than not love at all ?
To never love again I would never see and feel once more my world crumble and fall.
I will walk this path that has been chosen for me
Happy to be alone if sometimes lonely.”
July 2015
"Being misunderstood is the burden carried by every genius"
March 1996
This life you want,love for me and my love for you
Doesn't work in my head, I just want out,nothing else matters,go please do.
I've met someone else but they don't love me like you do, I can't be with them as they are not you.
Let's start again to you I say, Please let it work out this time I hear you pray
It's not you it's me,I can't do this anymore,Once again your heart broken I point you to the door
We can be friends and do everything that we did before, I'm not trying to play head games I lie to myself, I'm just confused for that I am sure.
Time goes by and you meet another girl, Butterflies in your belly, your heart in a swirl.
I know the signs as those misty eyes for me you once had, I lie again to myself that I am so glad.
July 2015
You say that you will never love again, it hurts too much, forever ruined by my witches touch
I say you are stupid and will forever lonely
You say I have been all my life but you broke that spell but for a short time only.
July 2015
Never underestimate the guile of the patient man
January 2016